Things I never meant to tell you

by Apes of the State

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about

This EP was recorded in various closets and bedrooms of friends around Lancaster City, PA. It is a preview to a full band project in the works, Apes of the State. Big thanks to all of the things I resent, like social inequality, gender norms, the failure of the American education system, and all the girls that dumped me this year for making this record possible.

credits

released September 28, 2015

Written, produced, and recorded by Apes.

Thanks to all my friends who made sounds with me:

Silvas & Jewels- vocals
Tony Dicarluccio- keys, harmonica
Charlie- bass
Dan Ebersole- mandolin
Justin Jones- xylophone
Dan Freeman-sax

Album art by Michelle Antisocial (everyone except me)

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all rights reserved

about

Apes of the State Lancaster, Pennsylvania

folk/pop/punk

for booking email
apesofthestate@gmail.com
April Hartman
Dan Ebersole
Mollie Swartz

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Track Name: Conversations with the self-centered
Please excuse my manners for I suffer from a problem
of believing that my thoughts won't go away unless I say them
So it might sound like I'm talking to myself when I'm deep in conversation
It's a problem that I'm working on, I thank you for your patience
But imagine for a second if I could listen to every word that you just said
Instead of getting caught up in my head trying to finish all your sentences
and occasionally letting the words slip form my lips that I want to say next
But if I wanted to hear what I wanted to hear I would talk to myself all day instead of you
Lalala I can't hear you
Lalalala I'm not listening
Now I'm hating on myself but I'm not getting better so I'm hating on you so it's not self-centered now I'm hating on you but I'm not feeling better so I'm hating on myself and I just need to breathe
God grant me serenity and I swear that if I make it through this moment then I will believe
God grant me serenity and I swear that if I make it through this moment then I will believe in you
Lalalala I can't hear you
Lalalallalalala
And sometimes when I play my songs I wonder if there's anyone listening at all but I swear to god I hope I die before I ever get bored of singing to myself
Track Name: Plate glass apology
Excuse me while I go jump through a plate glass window or stop driving in the middle of the road
My car insurance is expired, enough to set my ass on fire
I'll just go to bed and deal with it tomorrow

You broke my heart I hope you die, emptier than how I feel inside
and when you lay your head to rest at night I hope that you never fall asleep when you
think of all the things you do I wish I could just hate you oh I wish all of
these words I said were true

Now I'm up at 5am again, writing letters from the demons in my head to leave outside your house
I'm not sure why it is I'm fighting, the pens ran out but I kept writing and I hope that if you found that letter, you just threw it out because
Baby I don't mean the things I say or do when I'm mad at you I'm just trying to figure out how life goes on without you

and I hope I die you broke my heart, stick a needle in my arm I know just what I'm running from I know that I will tear myself apart

I wonder if you still have the flowers that i brought you at work the day you dumped me
hope it wasn't a waste of money
I hope that you are happy hope you find everything you ever wanted in your life, I hope you're sleeping well at night
While I'm trying to figure out if life goes on without you, by writing a song about you
Yea I swore I'd never write another song about you, I'm singing a song about you

You broke my heart I hope you die, emptier than how I feel inside
and when you lay your head to rest at night I hope that you never fall asleep when you
think of all the things you do I wish I could just hate you oh I meant every word I said
and I hope I die you broke my heart, stick a needle in my arm I know just what I'm running from I know that I will tear myself apart
Track Name: Things I never meant to tell you
I got sober intentions cause I'm always fucking sober and I have
every intention of being your next crazy ex girlfriend
no shame in saying it out loud
and I didn't even like you that much, but I can't stop writing songs about you
Hope you like em, hope you like em, hope you do
Hope your new boyfriends like them
Hope he sings along with you

And I got sober intentions but I'm stumbling drunk off anger
I can't stop singing, I'm spitting words like fire straight at you
I'm sorry if I burned your cute new hairdo
And I don't even hate you that much
but I can't stop being sad about this
I have had it I have had it, I'm a mess
I'm going crazy over a goddamn facebook status

And I got sober intentions but I'm strung out on emotions
I'm angry, inspired, I'm on fire
and I'm sitting on my bed
Throwing a tantrum while playing my guitar again
And I don't even hate him that much
but when you break his heart I hope he can't stop writing angry poems about it
Hope he loves you more than I did
Track Name: Bill collectors theme song
when I was just a little kid they told me to dream big
you can do anything
when I got older they told me to stop dreaming
start being more realistic, make the coffee do the dishes
but I can't seem to keep my head out of the clouds
cause whats the point of living life
to work until I die
That can't be it and if it is then I want out
and honestly I never had a dream of getting older
but here I am what can I do about it, tell me what to do about it now

Cause I never wanted to be every single stereotype of a white middle class 20-something pissed at the economy
I never meant to be the epitome of a quarter life crisis and being a junkie didn't live up to the hype

When I was just a little kid they told me I was special
Then I grew up and found out they told that to every single one of us
get addicted to our drugs then go away to universities
where we'll sell you dreams then make you work for free
They handed us an economy thats destined us for poverty
then have the nerve to call us soft and lazy for complaining
cause they're from a generation where you could be what you wanted to be
but baby I'm a 90's kid, only 90's kids will understand this

got bill collectors calling us to pay back student loans
but they can't ever find us if we throw away our phones
then we can sit in diners, drinking coffee smoking cigarettes outside
look in each others' eyes without cell phone lights to hide behind and
we can just kick off our shoes and make these sidewalks home
we'll write songs and sing for food and we'll never be alone
never be alone, never be alone, never be alone when we're with friends
and we'll never owe shit to anyone else
no we'll never owe shit to anyone else
no we'll never owe shit to anyone else
no we'll never owe shit to anyone
Track Name: Erase your number
So I tried to erase you number, but then I thought and I uncovered
more things that I had to say to you
more ways to tell you, how much I love you and that I miss you

So I tried to erase your number, but then I thought and I remembered
more things that I need to say I'm sorry for
so I told you that once more

So I tried to erase your number, but I can't help feeling like this isn't over
and the more time and space I have, the more that I think that
you'll probably never answer

So I finally erased your number and it didn't help me feel any better
so while I sit and wait for you to call
I wrote you a song
Track Name: Bill collectors theme song (BONUS adorable edition)
when I was just a little kid they told me to dream big
you can do anything
when I got older they told me to stop dreaming
start being more realistic, make the coffee do the dishes
but I can't seem to keep my head out of the clouds
cause whats the point of living life
to work until I die
That can't be it and if it is then I want out
and honestly I never had a dream of getting older
but here I am what can I do about it, tell me what to do about it now

Cause I never wanted to be every single stereotype of a white middle class 20-something pissed at the economy
I never meant to be the epitome of a quarter life crisis and being a junkie didn't live up to the hype

When I was just a little kid they told me I was special
Then I grew up and found out they told that to every single one of us
get addicted to our drugs then go away to universities
where we'll sell you dreams then make you work for free
They handed us an economy thats destined us for poverty
then have the nerve to call us soft and lazy for complaining
cause they're from a generation where you could be what you wanted to be
but baby I'm a 90's kid, only 90's kids will understand this

got bill collectors calling us to pay back student loans
but they can't ever find us if we throw away our phones
then we can sit in diners, drinking coffee smoking cigarettes outside
look in each others' eyes without cell phone lights to hide behind and
we can just kick off our shoes and make these sidewalks home
we'll write songs and sing for food and we'll never be alone
never be alone, never be alone, never be alone when we're with friends
and we'll never owe shit to anyone else
no we'll never owe shit to anyone else
no we'll never owe shit to anyone else
no we'll never owe shit to anyone